In many countries around the world, children are taught from an early age to respect their elders. Even when they are in the need of advice it is common for them to seek the approval of the older members of the family when making a decision. It goes as far as choosing a future husband or wife, choosing an occupation or college education. Older people have always been considered wiser and smarter than the rest. But does wisdom really come with age?

When you look back at your life, it doesn’t really matter how old you are right now. Do you wish there were things you have known when you were younger? Things about life? I believe that wisdom comes from experience. And experience is not necessarily connected with age. Some people can lead a really sheltered life and don’t know much about struggling financially or have any existential concerns. I have personally met some really old people who were college educated but very narrow in their minds. At the same time, I have met some who may have not even finished high school but knew more about life than their years would lead you to believe. And there are things that wise people have in common that I have noticed over the years.

Speak their mind

When you come to a certain age or even when you go through certain things in life you tend to avoid going around the bush. Even for me when I got to a certain age I stopped sugarcoating things. I would tell people what I think or what I mean in clear words without worrying about what they will think about me. As if more years under your belt give you some kind of freedom to speak your mind and stop caring about what people think. Maybe you become more confident. Or maybe you experience more of the world around you and see what is really important.

Personally, I just became more honest with myself and others. So when people asked for my opinion I would tell them what I really think and not what they wanted to hear. Once you start talking honestly it can become addictive. It’s not about hurting people’s feelings or being mean. It just feels like you don’t want to waste time and care more about the truth.

Being comfortable

There is something satisfying in being comfortable in your own skin. But for young people, there is so much pressure to keep appearances. However, some of us feel confident about ourselves. We have learned to accept who we are and be happy about it. It’s not like you can make yourself taller, prettier, or change the way people see you.

At some point in life, people stop trying to be something they are not. They turn to their own bodies, health, and spiritual awareness. Instead of putting on high heels, they will wear sensible shoes. Instead of putting on make-up every time they come out of the house, they will use that time to read a favorite book. The priorities have changed. Some of us just stop caring how the world sees us and start feeling comfortable. Does it mean we are wise? I mean if makeup makes you feel better go for it. But if reading a book and enjoying a nice glass of wine on a Friday night also makes you feel great that is another choice also. My point is that wise people do what they feel like it and what they are comfortable with without thinking about how the world sees them. And for that in today’s world, you need to have courage and confidence.

Having an opinion and being able to change it

Another sign of wisdom is that nothing is set in stone. Beliefs we had when we are in our twenties and thirties could change. Things we never thought we would do suddenly don’t feel that far away. It’s a great thing to have ideals. It’s amazing to have opinions on certain things happening in the world. But sometimes when you come to a discussion with people I often notice that people can be stubborn about it. No matter what you tell them they will never change the way they think. Even if you present them with new facts or scientific breakthroughs they will stick with what they believe and nothing can make them think otherwise.

I think wise people learn early in life that there are no constants. Our life never stops expanding and we should never stop learning. Things that we thought we knew ten or twenty years ago could be different now. It’s not a betrayal if you reevaluate your goals in life. It’s a sign of strength and intelligence if you can remain objective and see for yourself the new facts, and new things we learn about life and the world around us. Wise people change with time and always strive to find the truth and not be restricted by things they believe to be true. Keep an open mind and your knowledge will have no limits.

This reminds me of a situation when you come to a doctor’s office because you are sick. Would you prefer that your doctor diagnose and treat you just on the spot based on your symptoms? Or would you prefer if your doctor took the time to check new medical books, look for a better-suited treatment, and not be limited by things he learned in medical school ten years before?

Knowing the true value of values

This one certainly comes with age but not all of us have it. I believe wise people start to appreciate the value of time. And how they spend it and with whom they spend it. Maybe it is boring to sit through a family dinner every Sunday or you dread spending Christmas with your grandparents when all your friends are taking trips to tropical islands. But when you look back you will remember and cherish those moments you spend with your closest ones.

Every family is different and we all have problems in relationships with our parents or siblings. But we humans are social creatures and it is in our nature to gather and connect. What you will carry from that kind of meeting is the time you have to spend and the quality of the relationship you build with your family. Wise people see value when they connect with other people. They don’t do it to be popular or to post interesting photos on social media. You get a sense of love and affection when you value other people. When you value conversations and experiences you share with others. They could be happy or sad but there is still value in them.

I think one of the earliest feelings of happiness are the memories that are quite simple. And they are usually connected with close family members. Wise people will try to create those memories instead of buying expensive presents. They will take the time to get to know the people around them and what makes them happy. Creating happy experiences and showing that the world is much more than you see on tv or read on the news. Not all families are happy or perfect that is why every happy memory counts.